A new beginning...

Hello,

My name is Annie. Currently, I make a living as a personal trainer, barista, and seamstress. You can check out what I sew here. If I am not doing any of the aforementioned things, I can be found in the kitchen attempting some new recipe that I may only ever use once.

This is my blog to record my hopes and dreams, as well as my thoughts and feelings.

I expect that like anything, with practice this will get better too.



I sure hope so.

The power of will.

It only takes so long before I become tired of my own excuses and decide to do something about it. It isn't easy, and sometimes I break, but I find the harder I work the luckier I become. Abraham Lincoln said that once.

Sometimes, I get to this point of such extreme low self esteem it becomes paralyzing.

I've met these people that continue the way I have been. They are past my point. I don't want to be those people. They are so sad and so convicted in their self pity and excuses that they alienate those who love them. I find myself doing that too, but I saw a quote that made me rethink what I am doing now.

It said, "All it takes is 20 seconds of insane courage to change your life completely."

I thought about that and determined for myself that it does not matter if I think I can, or if I think I can't. I will. My convictions will be that I will, no matter what the circumstance. I believe self esteem is like any other human attribute - like a muscle. We must practice using it and train it every day in order for it to grow.

Tomorrow my wrist may not say anything, or it may say something different. It doesn't matter. As long as I have positive and strengthening reminders as to why I do what I do I can keep going.

Today, I will.

Coffee to start my day.

On the weekends this is what I do.

I had an inclination to take my camera with me to work this Saturday and take pictures while I was opening the coffee shop. While most people are hating their jobs, I tend to be enjoying mine. That's not to say it doesn't have it's downers as well, but for the most part it is pretty cool.

I mean, I get free coffee and tips.

That is what I stare at almost every day. It's either that or the blender depending on the time of year.

All of our drip coffee is Fair Trade Certified Organic. Sounds expensive, but if you bring your own cup the Joe is only a dollar. That includes cream and sugar too.

Life as a barista is not so bad. There is nothing like the smell of a coffee shop.

If I had a Pennee for every quilt I made,

I would have a few nieces.

My most adorable and only niece, Penelope, will be turning the big 1 in October. Seeing as how she is the first baby in my family I figuring a little spoiling will be called for. This will be her first quilt by me but certainly not her last.

Here is the top, hung from a random frame my father-in-law has in the yard.

The fabric is Alexander Henry's "Flea Market Friends", which is where all the inspiration came from. Everything from the random chandeliers to the cutesy hand drawn animals said, "Hi, I am the perfect mix between everything Curtis and Tracee." Curtis is my brother and Tracee my sister-in-law. They are the wonderful people who made the cutest darn kid I have seen up to this point.

This is actually the first quilt top that I designed. You can tell because that intersection there is supposed to have four brown strips coming from that brown and blue square in the middle. It does not because I forgot about that last piece. (Please excuse the Irish pennants. I am getting better at photography but sometimes I get so antsy that I forget to make everything look nice in the shot.)

That is what it looked like after I fixed it. I have a small crease on the bottom strip, which would normally gripe my ass but because I was so ready to get the quilt done I did not even care. I figure I can stitch over it with my soon-to-be amazing quilting skills.

Here is a close up of the tumbler. This is where the quilt started. From here it designed itself really.

The colors are not the best representation, however they get pretty close to what they look like when the quilt is being held. I am in the process of figuring out the best settings for my camera to take pictures of what I am doing while still taking into account the lighting. Photography has always been a hard one for me.

I am not so sure what I want to do for the back yet. I love the way Elizabeth Hartman uses elements from the front of her quilts to make the backs. They look like a piece of art themselves, which is what I aim for.

Feeling dead, not lifted.

I have spent this whole morning laying around either napping or playing on the computer. Regardless of which however, I have not left the couch. To anyone who knows me, that seems pretty uncharacteristic. I am the type of gal who usually hops out of bed and starts doing something immediately. (Especially these days. Gotta beat the heat!)

Today, I am not that gal. Today, I am the gal who can barely walk. 

Why?

Because I got overly excited about my new gym membership. 

On Wednesday I went to the local YMCA and signed up for a membership. This is exciting news seeing as how I have never belonged to a facility that has so much to offer! My brother-in-law works there, my sister works out there, a friend works and teaches classes there. What more could I ask for?

So after signing the paperwork I immediately parted ways with my mother, whom I joined with and headed straight for the weights. Generally I have some sort of workout plan, but that day I didn't. I decided to go with a tried and true, highly functional exercise, the dead lift.

Dead lifts aren't difficult for me. Stopping is difficult for me. Not over-doing it is difficult for me. Now, walking is difficult for me.

I did over 150 dead lifts Wednesday, which to some may sound like I am tooting my own horn. I'm not. It's actually quite embarrassing. You see, I have been a fitness enthusiast since I was 14 years old. So much in fact that last year I got my personal training certification. I understand that just because someone is certified doesn't mean they know all about it. But, I am the type to know all about it. Which means when I bent over and picked up that bar for the 100th time, I knew better. 

And now I'm semi-crippled from it. 

I'm pickin' up!

I can't begin to tell you how discouraging it is when I pick a large project, excitedly start it, and then part way through get overwhelmed. I feel like I am way in over my head and at that point don't know if I can even finish it. My self esteem starts to diminish along with my drive... It just sucks. So today, when I finished sewing up the petals for about half of my quilt I was so excited!

It's a real pick-me-up now to look over and see this pile.

Suddenly, I feel like I can go on...
Which is great because I did not cut enough petals to make all the blocks I need. I couldn't believe it, but when I did the math I realized this quilt will take 450 petals. 450!

...I didn't know what I was getting into.