A new beginning...

Hello,

My name is Annie. Currently, I make a living as a personal trainer, barista, and seamstress. You can check out what I sew here. If I am not doing any of the aforementioned things, I can be found in the kitchen attempting some new recipe that I may only ever use once.

This is my blog to record my hopes and dreams, as well as my thoughts and feelings.

I expect that like anything, with practice this will get better too.



I sure hope so.

The power of will.

It only takes so long before I become tired of my own excuses and decide to do something about it. It isn't easy, and sometimes I break, but I find the harder I work the luckier I become. Abraham Lincoln said that once.

Sometimes, I get to this point of such extreme low self esteem it becomes paralyzing.

I've met these people that continue the way I have been. They are past my point. I don't want to be those people. They are so sad and so convicted in their self pity and excuses that they alienate those who love them. I find myself doing that too, but I saw a quote that made me rethink what I am doing now.

It said, "All it takes is 20 seconds of insane courage to change your life completely."

I thought about that and determined for myself that it does not matter if I think I can, or if I think I can't. I will. My convictions will be that I will, no matter what the circumstance. I believe self esteem is like any other human attribute - like a muscle. We must practice using it and train it every day in order for it to grow.

Tomorrow my wrist may not say anything, or it may say something different. It doesn't matter. As long as I have positive and strengthening reminders as to why I do what I do I can keep going.

Today, I will.

Feeling dead, not lifted.

I have spent this whole morning laying around either napping or playing on the computer. Regardless of which however, I have not left the couch. To anyone who knows me, that seems pretty uncharacteristic. I am the type of gal who usually hops out of bed and starts doing something immediately. (Especially these days. Gotta beat the heat!)

Today, I am not that gal. Today, I am the gal who can barely walk. 

Why?

Because I got overly excited about my new gym membership. 

On Wednesday I went to the local YMCA and signed up for a membership. This is exciting news seeing as how I have never belonged to a facility that has so much to offer! My brother-in-law works there, my sister works out there, a friend works and teaches classes there. What more could I ask for?

So after signing the paperwork I immediately parted ways with my mother, whom I joined with and headed straight for the weights. Generally I have some sort of workout plan, but that day I didn't. I decided to go with a tried and true, highly functional exercise, the dead lift.

Dead lifts aren't difficult for me. Stopping is difficult for me. Not over-doing it is difficult for me. Now, walking is difficult for me.

I did over 150 dead lifts Wednesday, which to some may sound like I am tooting my own horn. I'm not. It's actually quite embarrassing. You see, I have been a fitness enthusiast since I was 14 years old. So much in fact that last year I got my personal training certification. I understand that just because someone is certified doesn't mean they know all about it. But, I am the type to know all about it. Which means when I bent over and picked up that bar for the 100th time, I knew better. 

And now I'm semi-crippled from it.